Stream of Consciousness:: "Hello Again!"

So here I am. Its been a while. Summer comes, and I am inundated with children and activities. I throw myself so completely into life around my children that I think I forget that I like to write. I have trouble getting into the moment without quiet. This is odd, because I used to think I liked activity to get me writing. What I like is activity around me that lets me work. That doesn't happen when my kids need me. 

I enjoy writing. Before, in High School and in College, I used to write because I had to. I don't mind writing because I have to. But after all the papers and stuff, you get older and "over it" in some ways. I want to know that i'm making a difference, I want to not be writing more than just a little journal on line. So why, then, do I write?

writing. for why. for why not.

for because

for to get words on paper

for to not be forgotten.

for to say what needs to be said.

what needs to be said? why do I write?

I write because life is beautiful, and God is good despite everything.

I write because I'm hungry

I write not to rant

I write sometimes to rant

I write because the page always listens, whether handwritten or typed.

The page always hears you whether your tears are wrong or not. 

especially when you know your tears are wrong.

I worry. I worry when I write that I'm being read. I worry if no one reads, then what kind of writer am I?But if I worry if I'm being read, then what kind of writer am I?

Sometimes I feel like there's different versions of me. And I suppose there are. I'm still me, but I adapt to suit situations. There are months when I'll sew like a fiend, finishing off project after project. Then, there'll be times when I haven't touched the sewing machine for months. The same holds true for baking, playing instruments, and writing. I think in the summer, my time gets away from me. I focus on my children, spending the days with them adventuring. It's hard for me to be introspective enough to write. So I do other projects that can be done easily while I'm surrounded by people. I found myself doing a great deal of sewing this summer.

Life giving? Yes, this is indeed life giving. My heart feels good having written.

Hello again dear readers. Happy September

Modern day parable

For my husband's 50th birthday, we've been surrounded by balloons! We blew up a bunch by ourselves, then we had some mylar and regular balloons inflated by helium.

I watched my kids keep the balloons we blew up in the air. Fine. I started the game, but I got tired, and watched. It takes a lot of effort to keep the balloon up in the air. Gravity does its job, and what goes up, comes back down.

The helium-inflated balloons stay up on their own. There's a difference between the mylar balloons and regular ones. After a couple of days, the regular balloons have started to sag to the ground, while the mylar ones, with thick skin, will probably stay in the air until August. Or until I pop them...

The balloons are like us, trying to stay in the air, trying to keep our spiritual life close to God. When we fill up with our own spirit, we can get in the air, but we come right back down. We get tired trying and trying to stay in the air. We watch mylar balloons stay and wonder what they do to stay afloat in the air.

What is the difference? A different kind of air. We need a different kind of Spirit to keep us going. That's what Yeshua means when he tells us that His burden is light and He will give us rest. I can't keep myself going without burning out. But when I allow the Spirit of God to fill my life, I won't get burned out.

So be the balloon filled with helium.

Small Miracles :: a moment to write

These last couple of weeks have been a skip in the new routines I've been getting used to. Finding time to write has been a challenge without the predictable hours of solitude. So, amidst furniture shopping, thinking about my brother's wedding, keeping the house running, and making dinner, all with extra people around, I am thankful.

I'm thankful for this little moment I have to throw out a few words in the universe and see if they catch.

Small Miracles :: my capable 10 year old

I remember the days when it was too hard for me to help my husband with the shoveling. After feeding the kids, cleaning, changing, dressing, diapering, I barely had time to throw the laundry into the dryer before having to make lunch.

But this year is different. Not only can all the kids occupy themselves outdoors while I can help shovel, occasionally, they can help. They can even do it independently! This morning, my oldest went outside to play in the snow before anyone else was dressed. I think the snowballs were calling him. I asked him to do a quick clean of the back walk, which he did.

Now, there's only the evidence of where he's been. My small miracle: a clean walkway, with the sun working on it to melt the rest, without any work on my part.

Look for a small miracle today. I bet you can find one!

Small Miracles:: the local planetarium

What do you do when you've had way too many snow days? And it's still too cool outside to do much with the kids. And you're on something of a tight budget so extra spending isn't part of the plan?

In New Haven, you head to the Leitner Planetarium. Small, and free, its a perfect little outing for a Sunday afternoon.

What do you do to beat cabin fever on a day like today?

Small Miracles:: Crockpot Pizza!

The other week, on a Wednesday, as we sat down to dinner, my daughter asked me why we didn't have pizza for dinner that night.  We had had a conversation earlier in the day throwing around dinner ideas, and pizza was one of them.  I apologized, and promised that we could have pizza the next day, if I could figure out how to have it ready to eat as soon as we walk in the door.  Thursdays are our craziest days. I pick the kids up from school, play for 2 ballet classes, then we rush home for dinner.  Generally, we eat sandwiches, or something straight from the crock pot.  Pizza is trickier. Even if I had the pizza ready to throw into the oven when we got home, it still would take longer to be ready than the time we have on a Thursday night.


So.  I went to good 'ole Google and searched for crock pot pizza and slow cooker pizza.  Wouldn't you know, I wasn't the only one thinking of such a thing!  It was hard to find what I wanted, however.  I had to sift through recipes for pizza casserole and pizza sauce.  I finally found what I wanted.

I found a link to crockingirls.com.  I'm really enjoying their website!  They have a ton of unorthodox slow cooker recipes.  I looked at their Slow Cooker Pizza recipe, and used the technique with my usual pizza dough recipe from Life as Mom instead of canned pizza dough.  I used half the batch of dough in the crock pot.  I could have used more like 1/3 and had a thinner crust.

To be fair, my first try was not the same as pizza baked quickly at a high temperature.  I've eaten much better.  I've made much better.  But it was cooked, the cheese was melted, and it wasn't burned. It was ready when we walked in the door.  The only one in my family that refused a piece was the child who refuses pizza anyway.

I'm sure with a little tweaking, this will become a regular in my rotation of easy crock pot dinners for my crazy evenings.