Yeah.
I really want to try to write something daily, and I really feel that I have things to say to the world. I felt the drive and need to use the time that I have while my kids are in school to do some writing. But finding a topic has been a challenge for me. As I was driving this morning, I was brainstorming topic ideas. All sorts of things came to mind, but they all seemed pretentious to me. Not that any of the topics in themselves are pretentious topics, but they didn't fit what I want to say today. This. This is where I need to start. Being me.
My challenge with this idea up front is my fear. But then I'm talking about myself, won't that be selfish? Who wants to hear about me? But yet, this topic rings true to my soul. Who else could I be?
A couple of years ago, I had a revelation as mom. People would ask me, "Dorothy, how are you doing?" And I'd answer. "We're fine."
I would proceed to detail how I cared for my children and their needs, how their sleep affected mine, and many other Mommy issues. One day I realized I was answering using the plural, because my identity had been as wrapped up in them as theirs had been in me. At that point, I had a 6 year-old, a 4 year-old, and a 1 year-old. With Daddy at work, Mommy and the kids became something of a unit. Sure, we needed each other a lot. And we still need each other. My children are now 9, 7, and 4. This stage is so much different. I get a chance to really explore being myself again, just as they are all starting to explore their interests and developing passions and dislikes.
So for the next 31 days, I will give myself the grace to be who I am. And maybe I'll learn something new.
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